I’m always checking-out “Trending Streams” on various platforms. Not just because I want to sift faster for my own viewing, but out of curiosity about what other people are turning to for diversion. Even before I read about its popular appeal, I took a dive into “Indian Matchmaker” on Netflix. Viewers can judge the series for themselves, but one of Sima Taparia’s (The Matchmaker) “tools” caused me to do some internet research on Face-Reading. For a very long time I’ve known that people’s faces — especially their eyes — reveal a lot about the kind of people they are. Even more so, as we age, my conclusion is that whatever’s on the ‘inside’ eventually shows up on the ‘outside’. I’m radiating beauty and health…or something else.
My forays into social media (which I regulate in the same way I do my urge to eat chocolate constantly) confirm conventional ideas about ‘aging’ and ‘beauty’. Growing older is mostly represented as my adversary. The media guides my thinking as I choose my ‘weapons’ to fight inevitable changes. Anyone who takes a peek inside my cosmetic boudoir can see how vulnerable I am to beauty marketing: jars, bottles, tubes, creams, elixirs and masques containing all of the latest science in skincare.
But lately I’ve been paying more attention to my face – and the faces of people close to me, and those I meet randomly — in a different way. William Shakespeare wrote that our eyes are “windows” into our souls. [https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/1359590-the-tempest] The playwright made no mention (that I can find) of the fact that he ‘lifted’ this idea from the Christian Bible. The biblical quote is even more explicit and thought-provoking: my eyes convey “light” or darkness; health or dis-ease; comfort in my self, or angst [ Matthew 6:22:24. https://www.biblegateway.com/]
On days when I struggle more vigorously with current life challenges, my eyes look a certain way. No matter how much sleep I get, they look tired…worried…not bright. I don’t know how else to describe it, but it’s legit, and legit bothersome. Because no pricey cream or eye drops will fix that. The fix will come from a place deep inside my being.
Out and about and in my intimate relationships, I’m definitely an eye-contact person. If someone can’t or won’t meet my eyes (not talking about cultural courtesies that preclude this), I’m intrigued. When I do look into someone’s eyes (like Sima’s Face-Reader) I feel more than I see. When a person radiates health and well-being, this pure and genuine beauty feels breath-taking. I might be looking into the eyes of a 90 year old, but the joy and light is unmistakable.
These days, I’m less preoccupied with my wrinkles and grays. A more youthful face and smoother skin might appear more attractive in a conventional sense, but eyes can tell a very different story. As I do my morning cleansing, toning and moisturizing, my own eyes reveal the degree of comfort and ease I feel; how present and at peace I am with my life. When I look closely, mostly I see hope and optimism; a kind of perky, silly joy in just being alive. Openness. Receptivity. Resilience. I care less about ‘concealing’ and ‘plumping’, and more about what I’m sending-out to others when our eyes meet.
I’ve realized that aging beautifully is actually a choice that I make daily. This choice is based on my belief that authentic and lasting beauty emanates from a joyful and peaceful heart (and a few basic lifestyle habits). None of the products that I let myself be seduced into buying (a process I actually enjoy, if I’m honest), is going to magically put that beautiful “all is well” light into my eyes.