You’ve heard the expression, “When times get tough, the tough get going”. My inner strength had to come early, to survive devastating events. My mother died I was 11 years old. My father and brothers did what many survivors of suicide do – they withdrew into silent grief. By age 12, I’d learned to cook, clean, and do the ironing — trying also to stay hopeful about my future. But my independent spirit was beginning to glow like a hot coal. I wanted more. I wanted freedom. I moved out of my family home at age 17; got an apartment using my mother’s social security benefits; and enrolled in community college. I found a job on campus. After University, I became a teacher.
Teaching led to my Counseling Psychology degree. When I took my first leadership role in educational administration, I felt vulnerable and insecure as a woman in a male-dominated setting. The constant compromises and many humbling experiences. I knew that I needed even more knowledge and credibility, so I went after my doctorate in Organizational Psych.
While I worked on my PsyD., an idea for a Blog became a mental spark. As I’d grown older, I also felt a lot wiser. I decided to call my first Blog, “Aging is an Attitude”. At any age, we all have one very important thing in common: the struggle to be authentic. How many times, in my own life, had I made important decisions that were totally disconnected from what I really wanted: job; a relationship; a marriage. Too many to count.
Compromises are a fact of life. But what I did, and many of us do, is conform: shaping our desires, beliefs and value systems to align with what we think others want. As women, we’re much more likely to “go along to get along”. We often put so much time and energy into a project, relationship, or other important commitment without being happy with the result. But change is terrifying and costly: emotionally, materially, spiritually. “The Art Of Living Bravely” means practicing self-awareness, and evolving strength. If there are specific topics you’d like help with, Counseling, Coaching and Consulting services are FREE via email (up to 5 Questions, followed by my Answers). See my “Northstar” tab for my professional email contact.
Yesterday I went to my favorite craft store for poster-making supplies. After suiting up (mask and gloves) I entered the large, cool cave of a place. Almost empty. The muzak was light and airy, for a vibe that was totally “Walking Dead”. Only a handful of people...
It’s the 21st of July and I am not feeling the love from this month. Almost since Day One. And if I can trust (what an important word in my life now, and in our world) what I hear and read, it’s pretty awful for a lot of other people also. What’s going on? It feels...